The Early Bird Catches The Worm!

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There goes one of the famous idioms, the origin of which has been recorded in John Ray’s A collection of English proverbs 1670, 1678:

“The early bird catcheth the worm.”

Ouch!

And now being almost 21 years old I think there’s something wrong in this idiom.

According to this idiom if a bird wants a worm, then it’s a MUST to have an alarm clock! Okay… But  then, what about the birds who can’t afford an alarm clock? The ones who suffer from poverty so much that having an alarm clock is way beyond their means? The ones who fly up the mountain and chirp real loud “I will work for an alarm clock”? Are they destined to live the rest their lives on bird feed stamps while the privileged ones are to climb the ladder of success further ahead with more food?

An acute problem, you see!

However I think this idiom is to imply that the champions who aspire to boom should wake up early. Da, da, damn! Then the final automatic disclaimer is I’m already screwed and doomed! I never wake up early now! 6 AM is my earliest and anything followed by an ‘AM’ is simply a killer! I just don’t see a point in dragging myself out of the bed when I could have a good day easily with more sleep! So I get up to pull myself right on time on the week days and a bit late during the week ends! Each time I miss anything due to the mere fact of working according to my schedule is all your fault, you silly bird! It’s all because you and all the goodie goodies who wake up early!

And I don’t even want a worm! I will only eat worms if they are gummy enough and come in with sugar on them in colourful  packets! I mean who wants a normal worm except for that creepy little birds? Personally I opt for sleeping in than chomping down on some icky bug. And I’m 100% sure the worm would also rather vote for sleeping in than becoming someone’s prey early morning.

 

See… I’m right as ALWAYS! 

So you silly dizzy bird, I have many reasons not to like you! And in fact I despise you! How dare you try to make us humans look like fools with your stupid attributes? You are the real fool cos at least we humans know to enjoy life other than going after worms!

Oh you moronic early bird, I only hope you go…

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One response »

  1. We must admit that clocks aren’t very expensive nowadays, so even a bird can afford one. 😀
    Even if they can’t, they can always depend on their friend-the rooster! 🙂

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